Wedding invitation etiquette can feel like a set of secret rules. The good news is that most of it comes down to one idea: make it easy for guests to know who is invited, where to be and how to reply. Here are clear answers to the questions couples ask most.
1. When should invitations go out?
Mail wedding invitations six to eight weeks before the wedding. For destination weddings, aim for ten to twelve weeks, and send save the dates even earlier.
2. Who should be named as hosts?
Traditionally, whoever pays for the wedding hosts it. Today, many couples simply write "Together with their families," which includes everyone gracefully.
3. Do we need save the dates?
They aren't required, but they help a lot, especially for travel, holiday dates and busy summer weekends. Send them six to eight months ahead.
4. How do we show who is invited?
The names on the envelope tell guests exactly who is invited. If children or a plus-one aren't named, they aren't invited.
5. Should we put our registry on the invitation?
No. Registry details belong on your wedding website. A small website card in the envelope is the easiest way to point guests there.
6. How do we say the reception is somewhere else?
Use a separate details card for the reception venue and time. If the reception is at the same place, "Reception to follow" is all you need.
7. When is the RSVP deadline?
Three to four weeks before the wedding. That gives you time to follow up and give final numbers to your caterer.
8. Can we send invitations by email?
Yes, especially for a small or casual wedding. Many couples send printed invitations to older relatives and digital ones to everyone else.
9. Do we invite people who can't come?
If someone close to you can't attend, sending an invitation is still a kind gesture. They will appreciate being included.
10. Should every guest get an invitation?
Send one invitation per household. Children over 18 who live at home usually get their own.
11. What about our officiant and wedding party?
Send them invitations too. It's a thoughtful touch, even when they already know every detail.
12. How much should our stationery match?
It doesn't have to match perfectly, but a single collection makes everything look considered. Our Black & White Orchids suite includes 34 matching pieces, from the engagement invitation to the thank-you card.
Bonus: three mistakes to avoid
- Forgetting the RSVP date. Without a clear deadline, replies trickle in for weeks. Put the date on the RSVP card in a size guests can't miss.
- Mailing too late. Holiday weekends and busy summer dates fill up fast. Six weeks is the minimum, and eight is safer.
- Skipping the proofread. Read every name, date and time out loud, then ask someone else to check it too. A sample invitation is the easiest way to catch errors before the full order.
The simple rule behind it all
When in doubt, choose clarity and kindness. Clear wording, a sensible timeline and a matching suite will answer most of your guests' questions before they ask them. For wording ideas, see our guide to wedding invitation wording.